Hypnotherapy For Business: Essential Tool or a Waste of Time?
Luxury London “It was [a way of being] cold, clinical, calculating and super confident,” replies Surtees, who now directly markets hypnotherapy as an answer to emotional behaviour on the trading floor. “Some traders are losing focus and letting emotions such as ... |
You're reading The 6 Step Guide To Staying Present Every Single Day, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you're enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.
Unfortunately, it’s common to wake up everyday with the anxiety of your long to-do list. With the amount of things we try to fit into one single day, it might include any one of a million tasks: work duties, school, kids, chores around the house, that weeknight dinner you promised your friend. It’s important to recognize that when you itemize these daily tasks and eventually start running on empty, checking things off the list, life around you is slipping by. It’s draining that positive energy from your body and mind that you need to in fact, be productive and creative throughout the day.
I felt like I was running on empty for 20-something years, waking up each day with the same routine and little variance on my to-do list—and trust me, lots of anxiety. It wasn’t until I truly started being mindful and present that I was able to take a stand for my life. Once I started waking up each day with clear thoughts, in lieu of an agonizing to-do list, my career of 30+ years did a 180-degree turn into something that I truly love to wake up to every day. I am full, clear and happy.
It’s time to take control of your life, start living in the moment, and approach each day with energetic mindfulness. Ask yourself: Will you allow fear or complacency to hold you back, or do you want to experience everything that life has to offer?
Here is a 6 step guide to help you get started:
Each morning when you mosey over to the bathroom mirror, greet yourself with a smile. Smile when you greet someone else. Your smile has the ability to not only help you feel better, but help others feel your positive energy around them. Hopefully, they’ll pay it forward, too.
Truly observe your surroundings, it doesn’t matter if the environment is urban, rural, ocean, mountain, or suburban. There is always something to notice and appreciate. Remember, most of the time the small details in life have the most to offer.
Perhaps you’ve always wanted to learn the tango, go horseback riding, or get creative in the kitchen… Free yourself up from the usual to-do list and put these at the top.
Appreciate those around you. We are often so caught up in our own world that we forget what it’s like to walk in someone else’s shoes. How does this fit into staying present? Being mindful of the people surrounding you directly affects your mood, energy and thoughts, in that moment.
Don’t sweat the small stuff. There’s so much we can’t control in our lives. What we can control is how we look at things. “You learn a lot about yourself, by the way you get out of something. It’s in the exit—where our growth lives.” –Danielle Doby
Breathing is an involuntary function we take for granted. Breathing detoxifies our bodies, which helps relieve tension, boost energy and increase stamina. There are a number of yogic breathing techniques that can be added to a meditation routine (or simply, morning routine) you might already have.
Wake up tomorrow and commit to living in the moment. Each day you vow to stop being complacent and live more mindfully, you are letting your true goals break through your (old) “to-do list.”
Debra Negrin is an integrative health coach and the founder of S.E.L.F. Integrative Health - a brand new destination for those looking to live a more fulfilled, healthy life. Visit her website for one-on-one coaching and follow her on Instagram!
You've read The 6 Step Guide To Staying Present Every Single Day, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you've enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.
Self Help Gurus etcCosmos |
This is your brain under hypnosis
Cosmos Researchers in the US scanned brains of 57 people during guided hypnosis and showed specific changes in activity and connectivity of just a few areas, such as those involved with brain-body connection. The results, published in Cerebral Cortex, could ... |
Going about our lives emotionlessly is robotic at best and, at worst, sociopathic.
It’s pathetic that the trope of the strong, independent woman who lacks any emotion except intense ferocity is still a thing we subscribe to at all. When strong fictional female characters on screen show compassion, lust or grief, it’s considered a “moment of weakness.”
5 Steps To Opening Up Emotionally In Your Relationship
In our daily lives, women are constantly told not to “get emotional” if we want to be taken seriously. This may be an oversimplification of the matter, but the point stands that, in our society, to show any emotion besides “determined, ambitious passion” somehow translates to weakness. And it’s bullsh*t.
A strong person can encounter an intense emotion, feel it deeply, control it, and use it as fuel to make the world a better place. The sad truth is that most people are terrified of uncomfortable feelings, both in themselves and especially in others.
Humanity is quick to dismiss an individual who exudes mental despair — only the strongest people have the compassion to run toward this type of distress and provide authentic comfort. This is rare.
Ignoring your feelings won’t make you stronger; in fact, just the opposite. Going about our lives emotionlessly is robotic at best, and, at worst, sociopathic. Ultimately, it’s a cowardly way to live and, as science has shown repeatedly, detrimental to our health.
Your feelings are there for a reason: to act like a rudder to navigate your life. Taking time to honor them not only spares you from unexpected, messy meltdowns, but it’s also the secret to creating your truest, happiest life.
This is not to say that emotions aren’t terrifying or really, really painful to deal with at times; they absolutely are. That’s what makes so many of us run away from them in the first place. But looking at them head-on, figuring out where they originate, and using them to propel you forward takes courage.
It also takes incredible discipline to feel sometimes devastating emotions and not lose yourself in them completely — a skill most people never have the strength to develop.
This enormous scope of emotion is among the greatest gifts we have as humans. It’s way past time to stop feeling too ashamed to fully experience this very natural tool for self-discovery just because those around us are afraid.
25 Things Ambitious, Get-What-They-Want Women Do WAY Differently
Dig deep. Feel what you need to feel (soberly and without hurting anyone). Use it to learn about yourself and live the life you’ll be happiest with. And don’t waste too much time on anyone who’s still afraid of tears or anger. Just don’t let them convince you that you’re the weak one.
This guest article originally appeared on YourTango.com: Being Emotionally Strong Doesn’t Mean Ignoring Your Feelings.
Some fats have an amazing negative effect on cognitive function and, potentially, eating habits.
Diets high in saturated fats can slow brain function, new research finds.
Saturated fats have a direct effect on the hypothalamus, an area of the brain which is critical for regulating hunger.
Eating saturated fats could, therefore, make it difficult to control your eating habits.
They can make it difficult to control how much you eat, the types of foods you choose to consume and when to stop eating.
Saturated fats are typically found in:
Unsaturated fats are typically found in:
Professors Marianna Crispino and Maria Pina Mollica, two of the study’s authors, said:
“These days, great attention is dedicated to the influence of the diet on people’s wellbeing. Although the effects of high fat diet on metabolism have been widely studied, little is known about the effects on the brain.”
The study on rats compared the effects of feeding them fish oils or a lardy diet over a period of six weeks.
Professors Crispino and Mollica said:
“The difference was very clear and we were amazed to establish the impact of a fatty diet onto the brain.
Our results suggest that being more aware about the type of fat consumed with the diet may reduce the risk of obesity and prevent several metabolic diseases.”
The study was published in the journal Frontiers in Cellular Neuroscience (Viggiano et al., 2016).
Vegetable brain image from Shutterstock
PsyBlog’s new ebook, “Spark” is a step-by-step guide to using psychological techniques to achieve the goals you want.
Being passionate about a project or goal — no matter how big or small — makes us feel alive.
It is invigorating to think about the changes you could make in yourself or in the world...
One particular type of stress takes the greatest toll on your appearance.
Financial stress takes the greatest toll on your appearance, a new study concludes.
People who have experienced the most financial stress across a decade looked the oldest, researchers found.
Professor Margie Lachman, who led the research, said:
“It may be that people who are under a lot of financial stress do not pay much attention to their appearance.
Stress can also accelerate the aging process.”
The study tracked 200 people from the mid-1990s for a decade.
Each had their photo taken before and after.
Their photos were judged for apparent age by 19 reviewers.
The results showed that people with the greatest financial stress over the decade looked the oldest.
Financial stress had the greatest impact on apparent ageing, in comparison to other sources.
This is consistent with the finding that people say that financial stresses are the most problematic in their lives.
Financial and work stress also makes people feel older themselves.
The study also revealed that:
The study was published in the journal of Research on Aging (Agrigoroaei et al., 2016).
Image credit: Sander van der Wel
PsyBlog’s new ebook, “Spark” is a step-by-step guide to using psychological techniques to achieve the goals you want.
Being passionate about a project or goal — no matter how big or small — makes us feel alive.
It is invigorating to think about the changes you could make in yourself or in the world...
“Working yourself to death?” your friend teases.
In America, this is more than a hackneyed expression. We stifle yawns on our morning commute; we slump into cramped seats on our way home. In between, our mental health hemorrhages. Yes, we are accessories to our mental health crisis.
The average American is overworked, clocking in at 47 per hours per week. In the legal and medical professions, young lawyers and doctors surpass 100 hours per week. Half of salaried employers average 50 or more hours per week.
Striving for the next promotion, raise, and title, stress and mental health issues are ancillary. We mythologize stress; it is a necessary ingredient to scale the corporate ladder. Hard-charging professionals boast about sacrificing sleep for spreadsheets. Amazon, in an infamous New York Times op-ed, brags about its workaholic culture. Its company ethos: work hard, play less. And if you question its turbo-charged culture, you can find serenity in your next position.
Sensing sagging morale among bleary-eyed staffers, well-meaning employers place foosball tables and complimentary snacks in posh break rooms. Other employers offer unlimited vacation time. But amidst the workplace soirees and complimentary baseball tickets, there is a tacit understanding: discuss mental health issues at your own peril.
The on-campus dry cleaning and complimentary tai chi classes are well-received perks. But they obscure the overarching issue: mental health stressors are compromising the American workforce. The statistics are sobering. According to an Impact of Depression at Work Audit study, a quarter of American workers have a diagnosable mental health issue. Nearly 40 percent of employees take 10 days off per year as a result of a mental health condition.
Mental health, despite its prevalence, remains a taboo subject within the American workforce. In today’s competitive workforce, employees are loathe to divulge mental health tribulations. They — rightfully so — fear employer reprisals and stigmatization.
Employers, meanwhile, offer limited, if any, accommodations to employees. Corporate wellness programs target diet, not depression. In the pressurized job market, productivity remains the benchmark. Mental health connotes weakness and unreliability; it is a convenient excuse for disinterested malcontents. “If you can’t do the job, we will find someone who can,” a callous employer disparages a chastened employee battling mental health issues. The unspoken consensus on mental health: you are on your own.
Employers and employees perpetuate this vicious cycle. Employers, disparaging mental health, cycle through “unproductive” employees. These employees, mischaracterized as malingerers, are unceremoniously dismissed. The economic fallout: an estimated $23 billion.
Meanwhile, employees, fearful of retribution, conceal their mental health diagnosis. Masking depression, anxiety, or bipolar disorder, inconsistency marks their performance. Some days the employer earns glowing reviews for his dedication; other days he arrives two hours late for the shareholder meeting. Employers, without any knowledge of an employee’s mental health trials, react punitively to the perceived insubordination. The result: talented workers jettisoned from position to position.
Here’s the sad irony: Companies spend millions in employee welfare, from gleaming campuses to the latest software upgrades. But when it comes to actual employee welfare, there is a fundamental disconnect between mental health and company performance. Company performance encompasses both the latest NASDAQ report and employers’ emotional well-being. Over 23 million Americans are nodding in agreement.
References
Saad, L. (2014, August 29). The 40-Hour Workweek Is Actually Longer — by Seven Hours. Retrieved from http://ift.tt/1pQKeFG.
Kantor, J. and Streitfeld, D. (2015, August 15). Inside Amazon: Wrestling Big Ideas In a Bruising Workforce. Retrieved from http://ift.tt/1IT6AfJ.
Investopedia (2013, 10 July). The Causes and Costs of Absenteeism in the Workplace. Retrieved from http://ift.tt/2aCvl9W.
Witters, D., Liu, D. & Agrawal, S. (2013, July 24). Depression Costs U.S. Workforce $23 Billion in Absenteeism. Retrieved from http://ift.tt/16jWTHa.
Kasia Bialasiewicz/Bigstock
New findings suggest that it would be appropriate to remove the diagnosis of transgender from its current classification as a mental disorder in the WHO International Classification of Diseases (ICD), according to a new study in Mexico City.
The research, led by the National Institute of Psychiatry Ramón de le Fuente Muñiz, involved interviewing 250 transgender people and found that distress and dysfunction (two major components of mental health diagnoses) were more strongly related to social rejection and violence rather than by gender incongruence itself.
Currently, transgender identity is classified as a mental disorder in both of the world’s main diagnostic manuals, the WHO’s ICD-10 and the American Psychiatric Association’s DSM-5. A major component of the definition of mental disorders is that they are associated with distress and impairment in functioning.
Labeling transgender identity as a mental disorder is becoming increasingly controversial and a WHO Working Group has recommended that transgender identity should no longer be classified as a mental disorder in ICD-11, but should instead come under a new chapter on conditions related to sexual health.
“Our findings support the idea that distress and dysfunction may be the result of stigmatization and maltreatment, rather than integral aspects of transgender identity,” said lead investigator Dr. Rebeca Robles, Mexican National Institute of Psychiatry.
“The next step is to confirm this in further studies in different countries, ahead of the approval of the WHO revision to International Classification of Diseases in 2018.”
The study is the first of several field trials and is currently being replicated in Brazil, France, India, Lebanon, and South Africa.
“Stigma associated with both mental disorder and transgender identity has contributed to the precarious legal status, human rights violations, and barriers to appropriate care among transgender people,” said senior author Professor Geoffrey Reed, National Autonomous University of Mexico.
“The definition of transgender identity as a mental disorder has been misused to justify denial of health care and contributed to the perception that transgender people must be treated by psychiatric specialists, creating barriers to health care services.”
“The definition has even been misused by some governments to deny self-determination and decision-making authority to transgender people in matters ranging from changing legal documents to child custody and reproduction.”
Researchers interviewed 250 transgender individuals aged 18-65 who were receiving health care services at the Condesa Clinic, the only publicly funded specialized clinic providing transgender health care services in Mexico City. Most participants were transgender women, assigned male sex at birth (199 participants, 80 percent).
During the study, they completed a detailed interview about their experience of gender incongruence in adolescence (e.g, discomfort with secondary sex characteristics, changes performed to be more similar to the desired gender, and asking to be referred to as the desired gender), and recalled related experiences of psychological distress, functional impairment, social rejection, and violence.
Participants reported first becoming aware of their transgender identity during childhood or adolescence (ages two to 17), and most experienced psychological distress related to gender incongruence during their adolescence (208, 83 percent), with depressive symptoms being the most common.
Family, social, or work or academic dysfunction during adolescence related to their gender identity was reported by nearly all participants (226, 90 percent).
Seventy-six percent of the participants reported experiencing social rejection related to gender incongruence, most commonly by family members, followed by schoolmates/co-workers and friends.
Sixty-three percent had been a victim of violence related to their gender identity; in nearly half of these cases, violence was perpetrated by a family member. Psychological and physical violence were the most commonly reported, and some experienced sexual violence.
The findings show that none of the gender incongruence variables predicted psychological distress or dysfunction, except in one case where asking to be referred to as the desired gender predicted school/work dysfunction. On the other hand, social rejection and violence were strong predictors of distress and all types of dysfunction.
“Rates of experiences related to social rejection and violence were extremely high in this study, and the frequency with which this occurred within participants own families is particularly disturbing,” Robles said.
“Unfortunately, the level of maltreatment experienced in this sample is consistent with other studies from around the world. This study highlights the need for policies and programs to reduce stigmatization and victimization of this population. The removal of transgender diagnoses from the classification of mental disorders can be a useful part of those efforts.”
The findings are published in The Lancet Psychiatry journal.
Source: The Lancet
Three months after quitting smoking, levels of dopamine in the brain return to normal, according to a new study published in the journal Biological Psychiatry. The findings suggest that dopamine deficits found in smokers are due to the smoking itself and are not necessarily a pre-existing risk factor.
A major challenge in understanding substance-related disorders lies in discovering the reasons why only some individuals become addicted, according to first author Dr. Lena Rademacher, postdoctoral fellow at the University of Lübeck in Germany.
Researchers believe that some individuals possess certain traits making them more vulnerable to addiction. They also suspect that brain circuits involving dopamine may be involved. Drugs of abuse release dopamine, and addiction to nicotine is connected to abnormalities in the dopamine system.
But it is still unknown whether smoking induces those abnormalities or if they already exist and contribute to risk of nicotine addiction.
For the study, senior author Dr. Ingo Vernaleken, Professor at RWTH Aachen University in Germany, led a team of researchers to examine dopamine function in chronic smokers before and after long-term cessation.
Using a brain imaging technique called positron emission tomography, the researchers measured the capacity for dopamine production in 30 men who were nicotine-dependent smokers as well as in 15 nonsmokers. After performing an initial scan on all participants, 15 smokers who successfully quit were scanned again after three months of abstinence from smoking and nicotine replacement.
The first scan showed a 15-20 percent reduction in the capacity for dopamine production in smokers compared with nonsmokers. The researchers expected this deficit to remain even after quitting, which would suggest it could be a marker of vulnerability for nicotine addiction. But they discovered that dopamine functioning returned to normal as time went on.
“Surprisingly, the alterations in dopamine synthesis capacity normalized through abstinence,” said Rademacher.
While the role of dopamine in vulnerability toward nicotine addiction cannot be excluded, the findings suggest that altered dopamine function of smokers is a consequence of nicotine consumption rather than the cause.
The findings raise the possibility that treatments might be developed that could help normalize the dopamine system in smokers.
“This study suggests that the first three months after one stops smoking may be a particularly vulnerable time for relapse, in part, because of persisting dopamine deficits. This observation raises the possibility that one might target these deficits with new treatments,” said Dr. John Krystal, editor of Biological Psychiatry.
Source: Elsevier
As fewer teens begin smoking for social reasons, those who continue to do so may be self-medicating for poor mental and physical health. In fact, today’s teens who smoke cigarettes on a daily basis are reporting greater health concerns than heavy smokers did in years past, according to a new study published in the journal Nicotine and Tobacco Research.
“Teens who smoke report significantly higher levels of health complaints than nonsmoking teens, and we found that this gap has widened over the years, even as the overall prevalence of teen smoking has dropped,” said Dr. Marc Braverman a professor, lead author and Extension specialist in the College of Public Health and Human Sciences at Oregon State University, who worked with collaborators in Norway.
“Some adolescents smoke as an attempt to cope with their health problems, and that subgroup may represent a growing proportion of teen smokers, as fewer teenagers are taking up smoking for social reasons.”
The researchers believe their study is the first to report the shifting relationship between daily smoking and health complaints in adolescence.
In most places around the world, far fewer people are smoking, which is very welcome news, said Braverman. But as smoking rates decline, helping the remaining smokers becomes much more challenging.
Some tobacco researchers believe that the remaining smokers tend to be more “hard-core” smokers, who have been smoking for a long time and either do not wish to quit or believe they would not be able to if they tried, he said.
“Many public health officials are asking what kinds of new strategies might be needed to reduce smoking prevalence, to say, the low single digits, and what kinds of resources that might require,” Braverman said. “Some smokers are more addicted to or dependent on cigarettes than others.”
Gaining a better understanding of the connection between health and smoking among teens will help public health officials deliver more helpful smoking cessation strategies for that age group, particularly those who smoke on a daily basis, Braverman said.
For the study, researchers evaluated data from the Health Behavior in School-Aged Children Study, an international collaborative project sponsored by the World Health Organization that began in the 1980s and currently includes 43 countries. Surveys of 11-, 13-, and 15-year-olds are conducted every four years in participating countries.
The researchers looked at smoking behaviors and health problems among 15-year-olds in Norway over five waves of the survey, from 1993-94 to 2009-10. They focused on Norway in part because it has experienced dramatic declines in smoking rates over that time period, which helps reveal how smoking populations have changed, Braverman said.
As part of the survey, the students were asked about their smoking behavior and how often they experienced certain health problems such as headache, stomachache, backache, dizziness, irritability, nervousness, feeling “low”, and sleep difficulties.
In addition to the changes in health complaints over time, the researchers found important differences in health complaints related to gender. Girls, in general, reported more health complaints than boys, but the difference between the sexes was significantly larger among smoking teens than nonsmoking teens. In particular, girls who smoked daily reported higher levels of health complaints than any other subgroup, Braverman said.
While the data did not allow for an explanation for this finding, the study raises concerns that teen girls might be at especially high risk for health problems associated with smoking, he said.
If teens are smoking as a coping mechanism for physical or psychological problems, they may be at greater risk for dependence and addiction than their peers who are smoking because of peer or social influences, Braverman said.
“And for those teens who smoke to cope with health problems, getting them to stop will likely require different strategies and more intensive intervention efforts than those that are commonly used,” Braverman said. “A ‘stop smoking’ media campaign probably won’t be enough.”
Source: Oregon State University
Victims of crime who report the incident to the police are less likely to become future victims compared with victims who don’t report the crime, according to a new study at the University of Iowa (UI).
The researchers evaluated data of more than 18,000 people who had been victims of crimes of interpersonal violence, such as sexual assault, robbery, threatened rape and threatened assault, and also property crimes like theft and burglary. Information was taken from the National Crime Victimization Survey, a database of non-fatal crime reports, and covered a period from 2008 to 2012.
Overall, the researchers found that victims who filed police reports about their initial experience were 22 percent less likely to be victimized again. Future interpersonal violence victimizations were 20 percent lower, and future thefts were 27 percent lower. Future burglaries did not decline with police reporting.
The findings suggest that this may be attributable to the increased awareness of victims, police action, and other services that victims receive after reporting their experience to authorities.
“We know that the role of police in society is to provide safety, and clearly we see that they are succeeding in this role. However, they cannot be successful without cooperation from the victims and community. That’s why it is important to report the victimizations to police,” said Dr. Shabbar I. Ranapurwala, lead author of the study and postdoctoral research scholar at the UI Injury Prevention Research Center.
Also involved in the study were Drs. Mark Berg, associate professor in the UI Department of Sociology, and Carri Casteel, associate professor in the UI Department of Occupational and Environmental Health.
According to national figures, about 54 percent of violent victimizations are not reported to the police. In the population studied by UI researchers, 59 percent of crime victims did not report their initial victimization to police.
Initial victimization was reported to the police more often by females (41.8 percent) than males (39.9 percent), by African-Americans (44.2 percent) more often than whites (40.6 percent), and by non-Hispanics (41.6 percent) more than Hispanics (36.7 percent). The most often reported initial victimization was burglary (59.1 percent), followed by interpersonal violence (51.5 percent) and theft (34.4 percent).
Many crimes go unreported to the police for fear of repercussions or because the crime is considered trivial, the researchers note.
“When victimizations are not reported to the police, this creates significant inaccuracies or errors in crime-rate estimates generated from official law enforcement data,” said Berg.
“Victim non-reporting, therefore, has significant consequences for policy,” he said. “For instance, the annual allocation of crime-control resources is partly determined by variations in serious crime rates, information that is based on official data sources.”
Understanding how reporting to police affects future victimization could help law enforcement and other government agencies better engage with victims, particularly those in minority communities, who experience higher rates of victimization, say the authors.
Such engagement can also include linking victims with services (e.g., social, financial, emotional, and legal) offered by local or state government, or by community organizations.
The findings are published online in the journal PLOS ONE.
Source: University of Iowa
You know that sinking feeling all too well. You’re expected to make an appearance at an upcoming family gathering, and you just know your sibling will be there — putting you down, as usual.
While some parents see bullying among their children as a normal form of sibling rivalry, few people realize that, in many families, it can continue well into adulthood.
So, what is it and why does it occur?
Sibling bullying can take many forms, but it is always done with the intention of shaming, belittling or excluding their victim. It can include name calling, threats, constant teasing and enlisting other siblings to join them in the bullying.
Bullying among siblings can occur because parents don’t take it seriously, assuming it is just a phase or that it is natural for siblings to fight and squabble among themselves. More often than not, though, bullying takes root within families where abuse and bullying tactics are practiced by the parents.
Children are wired to imitate the behavior they see around them, so it is no surprise that a child who is being bullied by an abusive parent goes on to bully others. As is so often the case with bullies, it will be those even less powerful than they are, such as younger siblings or classmates, who end up being the target. The child may also resort to various forms of bullying as a way of venting the frustration they feel at their parent’s ill treatment of them, but which they are powerless to stop.
Relationship dynamics between the bully and the victim often remain unchanged from childhood into adulthood. The bully continues to victimize their sibling because having someone to pick on boosts their own fragile sense of self-worth. The victim, worn down by years of ill treatment at the hands of their sibling, may feel resentful, but may also be at a loss as to how to change the situation, thus allowing the abuse to continue.
The bully may have become so used to having a sibling who can’t or won’t defend themselves that they don’t want the dynamic between them to change and become more healthy. Having someone to blame for their problems or take their frustration out on suits the bully and so they deliberately resist any attempts at sincere reconciliation.
After many attempts at trying to have a healthy relationship with the bullying sibling, most victims simply give up and accept the situation, however miserable it makes them. Some take the drastic, but necessary measure of avoiding contact with their sibling.
Estrangement between adult siblings is not as uncommon as most people think, with a recent study at Cornell University finding that one in ten adults have one or more family members from whom they are estranged. For many people in this situation, it is a last resort and one they may grapple with for years before finally taking the plunge. However, most report feeling a strong sense of relief that they no longer have to endure their bullying sibling’s behavior.
Luis Santos/Bigstock
You're reading 25 Best Websites to Learn New Skills Online, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you're enjoying this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.
You've read 25 Best Websites to Learn New Skills Online, originally posted on Pick the Brain | Motivation and Self Improvement. If you've enjoyed this, please visit our site for more inspirational articles.
Self Help Gurus etcPoughkeepsie Journal |
Hypnosis can bridge subconscious with conscious
Poughkeepsie Journal In the July edition of this magazine, I wrote about the differences between meditation and hypnosis. In the simplest of terms, meditation quiets the mind while hypnosis programs the mind. This month, let's take a look at how the mind works and how the ... |
I remember the day I turned 18 like it was yesterday. It came with a feeling of power and determination and the opportunity to finally put to use all of those things I knew to be true. I was young, dumb and, well, you can finish that phrase in your head.
We spend our teen years so sure of things. Those of us lucky enough to have nurturing, caring parents grew up in a cocoon of love and support. Our conceptions of the world are based on rose-tinted glasses telling us how the world should work.
I always got the usual eye rolls when I claimed something as fact that clearly wasn’t true. But now I was free to prove everyone wrong. I knew how the world worked and I was going to make it work for me. So, I didn’t need anyone’s help, right?
I was off to school. I had the freedom to stay out late and decide how I’d spend my free time. I could even choose not to go to class and make all of my time free time. I understood the value of an education, as I had seen my parents struggle growing up, so there was no way I was going to lose out on a world-class education.
But, I had the same theory every other freshman had. I believed I could stay out all night partying and still wake up for class in the morning without letting my grades slip. For all of you soon-to-be freshmen out there, I would like to draw your attention to what I like to call the “College Triangle Dilemma.”
I found myself choosing to have a vibrant social life while still getting good grades. That meant very little sleep. So, I turned to energy drinks. Lots and lots of energy drinks in the morning and afternoon would keep me fully awake in class. I swear, there were times where I could literally see sounds.
But chugging energy drinks meant that when I desperately needed sleep I couldn’t simply doze off. I turned to heavily drinking alcohol before bed. A couple screwdrivers would usually do the trick. I found that I could crash virtually on demand. Blacking out from alcohol is a very predictable way to fall asleep.
I was developing unhealthy habits. The more I relied on stimulants and sedatives to control my sleep/wake cycle, the more I was losing control and requiring heavier doses. My tolerance was my worst enemy. I kept drinking, consuming and sometimes even shooting more and more.
Amazingly, I earned a 4.0 GPA that year, but winter break was a disaster. Coming home for a few weeks meant my parents could monitor me.
Summer break was even worse. Months of trying to smuggle a case of Red Bull and vodka into the house wasn’t easy. Plus, my parents knew I was a bit “off.” My personality had warped into a more dependent version of me. If my levels weren’t just right, I was moody and incredibly mean. I knew I couldn’t keep poisoning my body. I knew I needed help.
The last thing I wanted to do was admit that I had failed to my parents. My grades were amazing and I had lots of friends, but mentally I was losing it. How could I admit that I needed help when I so desperately needed to show them I really was smarter than them and knew how the world worked?
I started Googling for answers. I thought that I could just go cold turkey and break the cycle. Some people can, some people can’t. Withdrawal can take weeks, months, or years.
Going back to school in a few months meant I needed answers quickly. So, I gave in. I asked for help and I had a long, painful conversation with my family. To my surprise they were supportive.
Recovery cost me a year of my education. I stayed at home and worked part-time at a grocery store to make ends meet. Then, when I was ready, I returned to school with a newfound respect for the “College Triangle.” I focused on finding balance, even when it was hard to say no to hanging out with friends. Creating a schedule for studying and sleeping allowed me to better budget my free time. Calibration is tough, but developing the willpower to balance yourself in the real world is a lifelong skill.
The right-hand bias, the leftie advantage, handedness and mental illness and more…
Around 10% of people are left-handed, and we still don’t really know why.
In fact, humans are the only species on the planet that show handedness.
For a long time it was assumed that being left-handed was some kind of reflection of a deep disturbance in childhood.
Thankfully, we know better now — but not much better.
While the assumption has always been that handedness is genetic, the evidence is thin.
One thing we can say about righties and lefties, though, is that the differences can extend deep into the mind and brain.
Lefties live in a world of discrimination.
Everything is set up for righties.
That extends to the very concept of right and left in the brain.
Right is, after all, right and left is, well, it might as well be called wrong.
When tested, people are found to associate things on their right-hand-side with being good and things on their left with being…not quite right.
Tie a righties’ arm behind her back, though, and she soon changes her tune.
Being a leftie is a decent advantage in sports — but only some sports.
Usually it’s the sports which involve less cooperation where being a leftie is advantage.
Baseball, boxing, hockey, fencing and table tennis are all sports where lefties are massively over-represented at the highest level.
In baseball, for example, over 50% of the best players are lefties.
When people have to work together in a sport — like football — then there’s much less advantage in being a leftie.
Around 95% of people are left-brained.
Remember that the brain is cross-wired to the body.
So the left-hand-side of the brain controls the right-hand-side of the body.
Left-brained people also have their speech and language centres in the left-hand-side of their brains.
Not all lefties are wired the opposite way, though, with their language and speech centres in the right-hand-side of the brain.
Some lefties still have left-side dominant brains.
The brains of lefties are probably different in all sorts of fascinating ways we don’t yet know about.
One thing we do know is that lefties use both halves of their brain to work out the difference between one person from another.
In contrast, righties process faces in the right-hand-side of the brain.
This is probably just the tip of the iceberg since lefties are routinely excluded from neuroimaging studies.
Because their brains are different, they screw up the results.
Sorry lefties, you’re too weird for science!
Talking of which…
Lefties have repeatedly been found to suffer higher incidence of mental illness.
They are disproportionately represented among patients suffering from psychosis and schizophrenia.
Careful, though, don’t discriminate: it doesn’t mean lefties are all mad — just that their risk is slightly higher.
One theory about why some people are lefties is that it comes down to hormones.
It turns out that men born in the winter are more likely to be left-handed.
The cause could be down to the way the seasons affect the hormones.
We do know that men are more likely to be lefties than women — so perhaps there’s something to the hormonal theory.
People vary a lot in how right- or left-handed they are.
Some people are heavily handed: they do everything with their right, or their left, hand.
Other people can go either way.
The ambidextrous also tend to be better at maths, one study has found.
Despite the popular view that lefties are more naturally talented, it’s righties who pull down 10-12% higher salaries, data from the US and the UK finds.
The higher wages amongst right-handers are probably due to the fact that they have, on average, greater cognitive skills than left-handers.
More on this here: Left-Handers or Right-Handers: Whose Brains Work Faster?
After all this talk of disunity in our species, let’s end on a universal note.
It turns out that lefties and righties are not all that different in the very thing that defines them.
Generally people can learn to use their non-dominant hand with almost as much precision as their dominant hand.
It just takes a bit of practice.
Typically there is only about a 10% difference between speed and accuracy with the dominant and non-dominant hand.
• Read on: Debunked: ‘Right-Brain’ and ‘Left-Brain’ Personalities
PsyBlog’s new ebook, “Spark” is a step-by-step guide to using psychological techniques to achieve the goals you want.
Being passionate about a project or goal — no matter how big or small — makes us feel alive.
It is invigorating to think about the changes you could make in yourself or in the world...
New York Times |
Is Hypnosis All in Your Head? Brain Scans Suggest Otherwise
New York Times The magician Byrne Perkins, left, using hypnosis on Herbert Easley in 1952. Researchers at Stanford have found that some parts of the brain function differently under hypnosis than during normal consciousness. Credit Loomis Dean/The LIFE Picture ... Neuroscientists say hypnosis changes your brain and could improve ...Quartz Your Brain During Hypnosis: See What Happens To Your Brain While Being HypnotizedThe Inquisitr Scientists Discover the Brain Areas Altered During HypnosisThe Science Explorer Genetic Literacy Project -CBS News -Arizona Daily Sun all 8 news articles » |
Resilience is one of the most useful skills there is. Having bad things happen to me and being able to bounce back without getting caught up in negative thoughts? Where do I sign up for that?
But even though we talk about “resilience” like it’s one thing, it might be more accurate to say that resilience is a collection of different coping skills. The more of these coping skills we accumulate, the more resilient we become.
It’s hard to just become more resilient but adding new coping skills to your resilience toolbox one at a time is a less daunting task.
For example, one skill to have in your resilience toolbox might be going out of your way to treat other people with kindness and generosity when you’re feeling down. Doing so builds resilience because even on days when negative things are happening in your life, you can still bring positivity to other people’s lives, which will make you feel good and in turn bring some positivity back to your life.
Similarly, you could work on building resilience by finding activities that create meaning in your life. You might discover that the more you have stable things in your life that give you a sense of ongoing purpose, the less you’ll be able to get blown off course by other bad things that happen to you.
Which coping skills turn out to be the most powerful tools in your resilience toolbox will be unique to you, so a little trial and error is called for. If you try as many different resilience-building coping tools as possible, you can keep the ones that work for your toolbox and throw out the rest.
So where do I find these resilience-building tools anyway? Not to worry. Ask the Therapists Marie Hartwell-Walker and Daniel J. Tomasulo have your back.
In this video, they describe several coping skills for developing resilience. Watch the video below, and visit Psych Central’s YouTube channel for more Ask the Therapist videos.
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“We conceive…a sort of gratitude for those inanimated objects, which have been the causes of great or frequent pleasure to us. The sailor, who, as soon as he got ashore, should mend [build] his fire with the plank upon which he had just escaped from a shipwreck, would seem to be guilty of an unnatural action. We should expect that he would rather preserve it with care and affection, as a monument that was, in some measure, dear to him.”
–Adam Smith, The Theory of Moral Sentiments
I love this passage, but the old-fashioned language may make it difficult to understand Smith’s point: when some object has done us great service, we’re reluctant to get rid of it.
Do you feel this way? I sure do.
For instance, as I write about in Happier at Home, I found it hard to say good-bye to my old laptops. We’d been through so much together! They’d worked so hard for me, we’d had so many good times together! But the old laptops were starting to take up a lot of space. I took a photograph of them, as a memento, and then sent them on their way.
On my Facebook Live video yesterday, we talked about the issue of managing mementos. Viewers suggested a lot of great hacks.
Mementos serve as important reminders of the people, places, and activities we love, and dear objects make our homes feel more homey. As long as they don’t get too overwhelming!
Wow, I’m just realizing that in my life as a writer, I really do burn through laptops.
The post Do You Struggle to Give Up an Object that Once Served You Well? For Me, My Laptops. appeared first on Gretchen Rubin.
Source: Psych Central
A new study finds that when it comes to prejudice, it doesn’t matter if you are smart or conservative or liberal. Each group has its own specific biases. In fact, […].Source: USA Today - U.S. News
An Indiana woman who accused a community college of discrimination lost her case because federal law offers no recourse for those who say they are are subject to workplace problems because of sexual orientation.Source: ScienceDaily
In psychiatric clinics with an exclusively open-door policy, the risk of patients committing suicide or absconding from treatment is no higher than in clinics with locked wards. This has been demonstrated in a large study in which around 350,000 cases were analyzed over a period of 15 years.Teenagers who have easy access to drugs and alcohol in the home are more likely to drink and do drugs in their early and late 20s, according to new research.
The study, by Michigan State University’s Dr. Cliff Broman, also found that the effects were more significant among white people and males.
“While there have been many studies linking alcohol and drug use by parents to substance use among youths, there is limited research on how the availability of alcohol and drugs in the home may influence patterns of use among offspring in the future,” said Broman, a professor of sociology.
“These findings provide evidence that the availability of illegal drugs and alcohol in the home while growing up is a critical factor in the later use of substances.”
Broman analyzed data from about 15,000 participants in the National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health when the survey participants were, on average, 16, 22 and 29 years old.
He found that participants who had illegal drugs and alcohol easily available to them during adolescence started using drugs and alcohol at an earlier age, and used drugs and alcohol more as they got older.
Male participants, who had alcohol and illegal drugs more available to them in the home during adolescence than female participants, subsequently drank and did drugs more in adulthood than females, the analysis found.
The study also found that whites were significantly more likely to use drugs and alcohol in adulthood than blacks, Hispanic and Asian participants. This was despite the fact that Hispanic and Asian participants generally had drugs and alcohol more easily available to them in the home during adolescence, according to the researcher.
The study appears in the Journal of Child & Adolescent Substance Abuse.
Source: Michigan State University
Photo: ‘These findings provide evidence that the availability of illegal drugs and alcohol in the home while growing up is a critical factor in the later use of substances,’ said Michigan State University sociologist Cliff Broman. Credit: Michigan State University.
A new study has found that preterm babies fed more breast milk in the first 28 days of life had larger deep nuclear gray matter volume and better IQs, academic achievement, memory and motor function by age 7.
“Our data support current recommendations for using mother’s milk to feed preterm babies during their neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) hospitalization,” said Mandy Brown Belfort, M.D., lead researcher and a physician in the Department of Newborn Medicine at Brigham and Women’s Hospital.
“This is not only important for moms, but also for hospitals, employers, and friends and family members, so that they can provide the support that’s needed during this time when mothers are under stress and working so hard to produce milk for their babies.”
For the study, published in The Journal of Pediatrics, researchers followed 180 preterm infants from birth to age 7.
They determined the number of days infants received breast milk as more than 50 percent of their nutritional intake from birth to 28 days of life.
The researchers also examined data related to regional brain volumes measured by magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) at each baby’s term equivalent age and at 7 years old. They also looked at cognitive and motor testing at age 7, including IQ, reading, mathematics, attention, working memory, language and visual perception.
The findings show that infants who received predominantly breast milk on more days during their NICU hospitalization had larger deep nuclear gray matter volume, an area important for processing and transmitting neural signals to other parts of the brain. When they were 7, these children performed better in IQ, mathematics, working memory and motor function tests.
Overall, breastfeeding correlated with better outcomes, including larger regional brain volumes at term equivalent and improved cognitive outcomes at age 7.
“Many mothers of preterm babies have difficulty providing breast milk for their babies, and we need to work hard to ensure that these mothers have the best possible support systems in place to maximize their ability to meet their own feeding goals,” Belfort said. “It’s also important to note that there are so many factors that influence a baby’s development, with breast milk being just one.”
Researchers note some limitations on the study, including that it was observational. Although they adjusted for factors such as differences in maternal education, some of the effects could possibly be explained by other factors that were not measured, such as greater maternal involvement in other aspects of infant care.
Belfort said future studies using other MRI techniques could provide more information about the specific ways in which human milk intake may influence the structure and function of the brain.
Source: Brigham and Women’s Hospital
New research from Boston College finds that compromise always occurs among two decision-makers when a woman is involved, but hardly ever when the pair of decision-makers are men.
“When men are in the presence of other men, they feel the need to prove their masculinity,” said co-researcher Dr. Hristina Nikolova, the Coughlin Sesquicentennial Assistant Professor of Marketing with the Carroll School of Management at Boston College.
“Both tend to push away from the compromise option because the compromise option is consistent with feminine norms. On the other hand, extremism is a more masculine trait, so that’s why both male partners tend to prefer an extreme option when making decisions together.”
While previous research has examined the compromise effect — the tendency to choose the middle, compromise option in a set of choices — using individuals, the new study examines joint decision-making.
“The decisions we make in pairs may be very different than those we make alone, depending on who we make them with,” the researchers said in the study, which was published in the Journal of Consumer Research. “Classic compromise effects, AKA the ‘goldilocks effect’ or ‘extremeness aversion,’ may not emerge in all joint consumption decisions.”
Nikolova and co-author Dr. Cati Lamberton, an associate professor of marketing with the Joseph M. Katz Graduate School of Business at the University of Pittsburgh, conducted four experiments with 1,204 students at two U.S universities, and a fifth experiment using 673 online participants.
The studies involved different pairs of a man and woman, two women, and two men making decisions on such things as buying printers, toothpaste, flashlights, tires, hotels, headphones, different sizes and shapes of grills, what prizes to seek in a lottery, and whether to buy risky or safe stocks with corresponding high and low returns.
“No matter what the product is, we see the same effects,” Nikolova said. “The compromise effect basically emerges in any pair when there is a woman. However, surprisingly, when you have men choosing together, they actually tend to push away from the compromise option and select one of the extreme options.”
“Say two men are choosing a car and the cars they are considering differ on safety and fuel efficiency — they will either go for the safest car or the one that offers them the most fuel efficiency, but they won’t choose an option that offers a little of both,” she explained.
In contrast, individuals and mixed-gender and female-female pairs will likely go for the middle option since it seems reasonable and is easily justified.
“In contrast to men, women act the same together as they would alone because they don’t need to prove anything in front of other women,” she said. “Womanhood is not precarious and does not need the same level of public defense as manhood. That’s why we observe the compromise effect in the joint decisions of two female partners.”
Interestingly, the research found that compromise is criticized among other men, but embraced by women.
“Only men judge other men very harshly when they suggest the compromise option to a male partner,” Nikolova said. “It doesn’t happen when a man suggests the compromise option to a female partner or when women suggest the compromise option, so it’s really specific to men dealing with other men.”
Nikolova says the findings are something corporate American will want to pay attention to and gear campaigns around since the compromise effect is a phenomenon often used to position products and drive sales. The study’s findings suggest that retailers and marketers should be aware of the gender composition of the joint decision-making pairs they might be targeting.
“For instance, marketers should be aware of the fact that when two men make decisions together, they are more likely to choose one of the extreme options,” she said. “So if a company wants to push sales toward a particular option, and they expect their target customers to primarily be men making decisions together, then it’s better to make the particular option an extreme option rather than a middle alternative.”
The findings can easily be applied by car sales people, she noted. When offering different cars, sales people need to pay attention to the gender composition of the decision-making pairs.
If a father and a son are purchasing the first car for the son together, it would be better for the sales person to make the particular car which he or she wants to sell (usually the most profitable one) an extreme option in the offered choices — the one with the most fuel efficiency, the best interior design, or the highest horsepower.
In contrast, if a male/female couple or a mother and a daughter are shopping together, it would be best to make that option a middle alternative by adding other alternatives that offer less or more of the particular attribute.
Nikolova added if an organization wants more middle ground decisions made, it’s critical to include a woman in the decision-making pair. In contrast, if a manager wants to “nudge” more all-or-nothing decisions, it is better to entrust them to two men.
As for consumers, it’s important for men to know that what they might buy themselves is different from what they would choose with another man.
“What we’re finding is when men have to choose alone, most select the compromise option,” she said. “But when they have to make the decision with another man, they tend to choose one of the extreme options, which is not something they would prefer if they were alone.
“It’s important for male consumers to be aware of this when making decisions with other people since the drive to prove their masculinity might lead them to make decisions that they might not enjoy later.”
Source: Boston College
A new study finds that when it comes to prejudice, it doesn’t matter if you are smart or conservative or liberal. Each group has its own specific biases.
In fact, the study found that cognitive ability — whether high or low — only predicts prejudice towards specific groups.
“Very few people are immune to expressing prejudice, especially prejudice towards people they disagree with,” said lead author Dr. Mark Brandt of Tilburg University in the Netherlands.
For their study, Brandt and Dr. Jarrett Crawford of The College of New Jersey analyzed data from 5,914 people in the United States that included a measure of verbal ability and prejudice towards 24 different groups.
Analyzing the results, the researchers found that people with both relatively higher and lower levels of cognitive ability show approximately equal levels of intergroup bias, but towards different groups.
For instance, people with low cognitive ability tended to express prejudice towards groups perceived as liberal and unconventional, such as atheists, gays and lesbians, as well as groups of people perceived as having low choice over group membership, such as ethnic minorities.
People with high cognitive ability showed the reverse pattern, according to the study’s findings. They tended to express prejudice towards groups perceived as conservative and conventional — Christians, the military, big business.
“There are a variety of belief systems and personality traits that people often think protect them from expressing prejudice,” Brandt said. “In our prior work we found that people high and low in the personality trait of openness to experience show very consistent links between seeing a group as ‘different from us’ and expressing prejudice towards that group. The same appears to be true for cognitive ability. ”
While previous work has found that people with low cognitive ability express more prejudice, Brandt said his study found this was limited to only some target groups.
“For other target groups, the relationship was in the opposite direction,” he said. “For these groups, people with high levels of cognitive ability expressed more prejudice. So, cognitive ability also does not seem to make people immune to expressing prejudice.”
The researchers noted they would like to see if their findings will replicate in new samples, with new target groups, and additional measures of cognitive ability.
“We used a measure of verbal ability, which is essentially a vocabulary test,” Brandt said. “Although this measure correlates pretty well with other measures of cognitive ability, it is not a perfect nor a complete measure.”
The study was published in the journal Social Psychological and Personality Science.
Source: Society for Personality and Social Psychology (SPSP)
